Measurements of costs, distances and meaning all have their own metrics.
Which is most valuable?
Sometimes the cost looks disproportionate to the value it provides, but I have found it worth while in terms of meaning.
Some years ago, I signed a lease for a storefront. I was not able to develop the business I had envisioned and it took the help of a lawyer to get out of the lease.
Even though it looked like a costly loss, it was worth it to me. It was the first time I had help to stand up to a bully.
More recently, acting on the best knowledge that I had, I rented a trailer to pick up some greenhouse frames. Even though I had rented the size trailer I was told to, it was too short to do the job.
Thanks to the gracious attitude of my husband, I was told that I was not wrong. He was very consistent about that. My internet research revealed nothing useful immediately, so very quickly we affirmed that there was definitely a solution available to us. While we continued driving, an idea came to him, which we were able to implement immediately.
The value for me which went deeper than the solution to the trailer was that “I was not wrong”. I realized that I had been carrying that sense of “being wrong” since early childhood. Through this experience, even though it cost the rental of the trailer, I was released from that long-term burden.
The environment that I am in while I write this post is one which holds many painful memories for me. Although I am reacting with pronounced panic attacks, I am grateful that I can still feel enough of the new Universe created by the new skills and techniques I have learned to acknowledge significant progress.
© 2016 Kathryn Hardage
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